It’s Father’s Day ya’ll! Every year as a single mother, this day has met me in a different place, in a different mindset. I think the same is true for many single moms. Some are blessed to have a man in their children’s lives that they can genuinely celebrate, but for many that is not the case. The reactions range from single moms offering Father’s Day wishes to each other to encourage and build them up for “pulling double duty” to others who ignore the day altogether and pray their kids won’t catch on and ask too many questions.
In the spirit of full disclosure, up until this year I was in the first group. My circle of single mom friends would all send each other messages and accolades on Father’s Day and we could celebrate our hard work and dedication to our children and our success at making it through yet another year doing the job of two people. With all that has taken place in my walk with the Father though, I can’t celebrate that way this year. This year I know that I have NEVER pulled double duty. I have NEVER done the job of two people. I have NEVER accomplished a single thing. It was and is still HIM and HIM alone!
I am not alone! The Head of this household, the Father who leads and parents with me is simply not visible in this earth…but the effects of His Presence are. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying there is no cause for celebration for single mother who functions only under the Covering of Yeshua, who parents with God alone. That is absolutely something to draw strength from there. But when we walk out that celebration in our physical lives, when we proclaim that forth from our mouths, we rob our children of their blessings. Now don’t click off the page just yet. Stay with me ya’ll I’m going somewhere.
The fifth commandment, honor your father and mother, is the hinge that holds to two purposes of the Law together. The purposes of the Law are to teach us what love is and how to live it out. In the Ten Commandments we see this birthed forth in a simple form. The first five teach us how to love God. They are all marked in Exodus 20 with the phrase “the LORD your God.” The second five teach us how to love each other. All other Law rests in these principles, hence the reason Yeshua could affirm the way the Law is simply broken down in Luke 10:27 as being Truth.
The fifth commandment is just a bit different than the rest though. It has the tag that identifies it as instructions on how to love God despite the fact that it deals with how to treat people. It is also the only commandment that comes with a promise, a reason for doing it. It says, “so that you may live long in the the land the LORD your God is giving you.” Honoring your father and mother, then has nothing to do with who or what your father and mother are or do. It is about loving God through honoring them so that you can live long in the land that He gives you.
Deuteronomy 6:7 tells us that it is our job to “impress [the commandments] on [our] children”. King James says, “teach them diligently.” So if we as single mothers intend for our children to grow and prosper, to live long in the land that we know the Father has given them, if we intend for them to truly love God in the way He has taught them to love Him, then it is our duty to diligently, with purpose and intention, teach them to honor their fathers. We have to teach them with the way we talk about their fathers, with the way we talk about our jobs as their parents, the way we live and behave daily, and the way we allow others to talk and behave in their presence. And yes, with celebrating them today.
I realize this is not as easy as it sounds and it will probably require answering some tough questions. Do yourself a favor and pray before you get started and work out as many answers with the Father as you can beforehand. But at some point today, yes today…Don’t let the enemy steal another year of the promise from your children over what some human man is or is not doing. At some point today, acknowledge Father’s Day and the man without whom you would not have the blessing sitting before you. Teach them how to honor because it is commanded, whether they feel it is deserved or not. Sacrifice your emotions and feeling for their spiritual futures and lay a powerful foundation for forgiveness and healing in your home. Your babies, no matter how old they are, deserve that blessing.
I pray you all courage and strength, peace and healing. Go forth and open the gates of Heaven in your home and in your children’s hearts. Blessings beloved! Shalom!~
Surrendered to Him~